Why You Need an iPad or How I Learnt to Stop Worrying and Love the Apple

There are moments in your life where you have to make some pretty serious moral choices. Sometimes these involve relationships, large sums of money or aspects of survival.

My recent moral dilemma was whether or not to buy an iPad, probably the hardest decision I’ve had to make in months. On the one hand they’re shiny and new and Steve Jobs is telling me I need one from the grave. On the other hand I couldn’t actually see what the purpose of a Tablet was. I have a computer, a laptop, a smart phone and a Nintendo DS. Any function a Tablet could perform, one of these devices could arguably do better.

Do we really need it? Yes.

For years I told myself I didn’t need an iPad (don’t pretend there are other viable Tablets) and that the Apple cult wouldn’t get my hard (kind of) earned money. Recently however you may have noticed that the third generation of the iPad came out. If you didn’t you’ve either been shut away in a bomb shelter since the cold war or you’re the CEO of Android and you have your fingers firmly planted in your ears and your eyes shut in sweet denial.

With more pixels than ever (I think I saw a pixel once on an iPad 2 and it made me sick) and a faster processor (I think?) the time was right for me to delve into the world of Tablets. It may have had something to do with the bombardment of advertising but I like to think I still have some semblance of free will.

I half justified it to myself and my dubious fiancé (and the tax department) by saying I would use it for work and I set off to try and hunt myself down The New iPad (why not call it iPad 3, you pretentious wankers?!? Ahem).

This proved slightly more difficult than first expected.

iPads (above 16gb) became scarce real quick. I was contemplating actually driving about three hours to track one down but even that store was sold out! Times were hard. I refused to accept that in this modern world I could not possess something I wanted at that exact moment in time with minimal effort. We’re not in bloody New Zealand!

Men once haunted for food. I was hunting for the ultimate piece of frivolous technology and I would not give up (except when I did the week before). My journey eventually led me to the one Apple Store in Brisbane which was a good hour and a half from where I live. And I’m so glad it did.

Walking into the Apple Store was like waking into a Cult of Technology. There were customers everywhere, enthusiastic sales people dripping with iGoods, iPads adorning every surface and every time someone made a purchase there was store wide applause. It was ridiculous. I was in Capitalist heaven. And I’ve dreamt about nothing since.

The next half an hour was a blur of smiles and swiping credit cards. I came out of my consumerist haze a couple of hours later with an iPad, smart case and a feeling of being used. A week on and my iPad comes everywhere with me.

Justified.

At work it has replaced my diary and will soon be filled with work related documents available at the swipe of a finger. At home (and let’s be honest, at work) it has replaced my phone for social media, casual gaming and Internet browsing. The giant screen is gorgeous and makes my Google Nexus look like yesteryear technology.

At first I was frustrated by Apple’s monopoly that iTunes kept trying to enforce on me. But a couple of free external programs allow you to actually use your iPad how you want. The uses for your tablet are only as limited as your imagination.

I’m in fact writing this article from the seat of my car on my iPad as my female drives up the coast for the Easter Holidays. It’s not as good for typing as a laptop but it gets the job done for anything less than essays. I’ve also got season 2 of Battlestar Galactica loaded up in case of family induced boredom and my next exciting purchase will be GTA3.

Gaming on the iPad has come a long way in the last couple of years and I can only see it taking off with the third generation. Due to the size of the screen and touch capability, the iPad is the best portable gaming hardware on the market.

Final thoughts.

But wait! I hear you cry. I don’t want to sell my soul to Apple, I still have my integrity, but also want a Tablet. These thoughts did also cross my mind but unfortunately Android Tablets can’t realistically compete. The hardware is just not at the same standard, iOS 5 is too pretty to be without and the App stores are not comparable when it comes to Tablets. Sorry Android, I wanted to love you so much, but you’re just not up to my standards. Awkward.

Finally it’s a proven fact that an iPad makes you more attractive to the opposite sex. That’s what the store person told me at least. They wouldn’t lie, right? If you can afford the not too outrageous price tag and are already use to being an Apple slave then I full-heartedly recommend getting your hands on the new generation of iPads.

If you’ve already got an iPad 2 then the update probably isn’t worth it. If you’ve got an iPad 1 then hang your head in shame. You are less than human. Update immediately.

For more from Chazz check out his Girlfriends and Games series. For some free gaming check out his World of Tanks review, or just follow him on Twitter.